Wednesday, 17 April 2013

Wedding Bliss

I've never been a fan of weddings.
Is that bad of me?
I just don't get excited as others do.
Yes, they are beautiful occasions filled with love and happiness and joy, and they are a time for family and friends to come together and share in these emotions that are radiating out of your lives.
But I've just never been an avid fan.

I suppose the prime reason is that for me, weddings are superfluous. An expensive surplus I might add. The use of hard earned funds that would be better spent on a mortgage or holiday.
My parents aren't married.
Never have been - to each other. Have never needed to be. So yes, I am a bastard. But it's never been an issue. I have never had to deal with negativity as a result. When people find out they're surprised more than anything, but by then they know me for me, not me for my parents marriage license. Perhaps there are a few stories floating around, of the struggles my mother underwent to stop my school referring to her as Mrs.  But nothing more than that.

I suppose it hasn't helped that the 'happily ever after' of Disney's princesses never reared its ugly head in my childhood. Marriage was taught through real people. Family members who decided not to marry. Family members who married and then divorced. Family members who married and perhaps should have divorced had religion or financial circumstances allowed. Family members who married and then ignored the conventions of marriage altogether. Family members who weathered the storm and came out stronger.
It was never viewed through rose-tinted glasses.
Never treated as a life ambition. Education and Self Identity held that position.

However I understand that most people are not like me.
I do.
Most people like a wedding. Most people like to witness the beginning of a marriage, of a new start to a new life together. But unless its the wedding of acquaintances rather than family and friends, its a (quasi)religious ceremony followed by the same conversations by the same people at greater expense.
And as the evening unfolds, stories emerge of the torment of arranging the venue, annoyance of chasing up rsvps, expense of getting the dress fitted, anguish of choosing the photographer, disgust at the selfishness of a bridesmaid, time involved in making the place settings, time involved in writing the invites, time involved in addressing the bonbonerie, time involved in making the table decorations, time involved in setting up and cleaning up the reception hall...
So, by all means, get married, it is after all your decision, not mine.
Just give me something to do so that I may ease your burden as opposed to adding to it.

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